Arguing is Good for Friendship 

By Sami Alnabelsi

Have you ever been irritated with a friend? For instance, do you have a friend who tends to be a know-it-all or condescending? Or, maybe they’re indecisive when you need a decision. Or, maybe they have a habit of interrupting. Or, they have an opinion that differs from yours. Well, here is a simple solution. Just argue. If you talk about your issues with your friend, you are more likely to solve the issue. The only rule: have a constructive argument. Let’s talk about it. 

How to argue constructively:

Productive arguments

1. The number one rule in having a productive argument is having an open mind. Listening doesn’t mean acceptance, but it means having the ability to understand your friends’ issues. One tip if you aren’t very open minded is to set a date to argue with your friend when you are not preoccupied with something–like meet on a weekend. According to Psychology Today, “One of the biggest mistakes when trying to talk things out is coming into arguments with raw emotions and not actually taking into account what your friend is saying.” Having a free schedule that day will allow your brain to be clear of any worries, and you can focus on the issues between you and your friend. 

Having a good mindset

2. Another great tip is having the mindset that talking things out is not really a threat but more of an action that can help you and your friend get even closer. Arguing might feel nerve wracking at first, but in the end, it will all be worth it. Some of you might go into arguments with your mind fixated on what it will result in. You should be flexible when you go through these arguments and realize that you’re understanding someone else’s perspective. 

Stand your ground

3. While you should be open minded, you have to make sure you stand your ground. Sometimes in friendships, there might be someone who is the “know-it-all” and you can’t just agree with them on everything. Don’t be afraid to tell your side of the story. 

Remember no one is perfect

4. You must understand that not a single human being is perfect, and while your friend may bring up instances where you should change, it doesn’t mean you MUST change. It’s also vice versa; if you tell your friend something you dislike, you can’t expect them to change. It may take time or won’t even happen at all. 

In conclusion, having arguments can be very beneficial if they are taken seriously and conducted in a respectful and constructive manner. This will result in an even closer bond with your friend as you get to understand their side of the story.

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