Luke’s Letter of Resignation

May 28, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org 2 Comments

By Luke Langlois

Over the years, thebirdonfire.org has brought plenty of enrichment to my mind. First as a reader, then as a frequent commenter, and now as an author. Although it may seem like an elective that pales in comparison to something as grandeur as drama, blog class perhaps offers you the best opportunity to individually improve. It facilitates creativity, writing, collaboration, critical thinking, attention to detail, and, most of all, individual accountability given our small staff. At the same time, however, blog class is relaxed and almost never serves as a source of stress (unless you fall behind;, don’t fall behind). Plus, having published posts provide college admissions officers another look into the voice of a student, and getting into college is almost never a bad thing. Did I mention the glory? So much glory. Simply put, blog may not seem like an appealing class at first, but it has something substantial to offer to everyone.

As a graduating senior, it will become a bit more difficult to be a staff writer for thebirdonfire.org. Yes, it would be possible for me to send a post as an alumnus, but some things just need to have a strong ending. As such, I am officially resigning from my position as a staff writer, and there will be no reboot. Nonetheless, every single time I put fingers to a keyboard (or, the outdated method, pen to paper), the flare I gained from the blog will shine in my writing. I thank anyone and everyone who ever read my posts, even the internet bots floating around that stumble upon our blog. Now, I must prepare for the long journey (two hours down the freeway) to the slightly larger playing field at USC. Luckily, my absence from the blog will hardly be a factor due to the fully capable people reading this post right now: the students. You guys have incredible writing talents that are just waiting to be uncovered and, well, blog class is waiting. Keep up the legendary name of thebirdonfire.org and create your own little twisted digital masterpieces. Anyways, it’s been real. So long, farewell, and thanks for all of the Oxford commas.

The Last Editor: Katelin Slosky

Why I am Disappointed in the College Board

May 14, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org 3 Comments

Editor Quintus, as one of his last tasks of the 2020 school year, assigned the Blog Staff the theme “Awakening.” Luke finds he’s had an “awakening” regarding the College Board’s handling of this year’s AP exams.

By Luke Langlois, AP Student

COLLEGE BOARD: All Recent Standardized Test Scores to be Cancelled ...

If you are a long-time reader, you would recall that I wrote a post a while ago encouraging students to take AP courses for a variety of reasons including (but not limited to), the challenge, the thrill, the actual learning, and college credit. While I still encourage students to take more challenging courses, it is because of the teachers and your peers, not the College Board. I have never been one to call out the College Board for being a greedy nonprofit (and trust me, there is plenty of that out there) because, at the end of the day, they tend to put out a strong product. Undoubtedly, these examinations favor society’s more affluent, but, for the most part, they accurately reflect how successful a student will be in college or a student’s AP course knowledge. This year, however, has been an awakening for me regarding this organization. The AP exams this year are, simply put, a poor way to measure a student’s course knowledge. Here’s why:

A year’s worth of coursework CANNOT be accurately assessed in 45 minutes: If you are not in touch with the AP system, exams usually last three hours, and even then, the accuracy of the assessments are questioned. Due to this year’s pandemic, these exams have been cut down to 45 minutes. It almost seems comical when I write it down. Imagine condensing 180 days (or more) of instructional time to 45 minutes, or the equivalent of one class period. That is BONKERS and makes these exams so much more “luck” based. We all have weak points, and sometimes questions on assessments just don’t click with us. We answer the question, and we move on, but there are always other questions to make up for it. Not this year. If a student does not “click” with a particular literature or rhetoric passage, suck it up! If a student blanks on one calculus concept, deal with it! And, in the case of some APs, a student could be completely inept in huge chunks of the course and still get a good score for knowing how to do one part. How does that accurately measure whether you deserve college credit? Literature, for example, is testing only a prose passage. Does it matter if I read any poetry? Nope!
Students abroad are having to take the exams in the dead hours of the night: Ever taken an exam at 1:30 a.m.? AP students in India have! Students with parents who are in the military or work traveling jobs not only have to take an AP exam in a completely new format, they have to do it at freakish times. Any test-taking guide will tell you that half the battle in a test is being comfortable with your environment. Yet, students around the world are having to disrupt their sleep schedules and take these exams tired. I understand that there are security concerns and thus the test “MUST” be administered at the same time. Would it have been so difficult for a billion-dollar organization to create a few more test problems (a test of 45 minutes, no less) to let these students take their tests at a reasonable time?
Equity issues are exacerbated and preventing cheating is much more difficult: Imagine having to open the AP exam and upload your responses, whether it be typed or photographed, on your mom’s old phone with a barely functioning operating system. Unfortunately, this is the only device in your modest house, a house where finding a quiet place to take the exam is impossible. Now, imagine taking the exam with your phone to photograph and upload, your laptop to display your notes, and your desktop to display the prompt inside your sound-proof room on top of your spacious desk. The College Board does offer limited accommodations, but there is nothing that can truly close this gap. Now, this is intertwined with the issue of cheating because it would be incredibly easy to hire someone else to take the exam for you. I went through the security checks and, trust me, it would not be difficult to bypass that. On the same note, what happens if one of my parents is a calculus teacher? Perhaps they would be ethical, but we all know that parents have paid half a million dollars for SAT advantages; why wouldn’t a parent give their kid an advantage for free? This year, the teachers are able to view the exams, allowing them to see if the work matches the student, which may be able to counteract this to an extent, but that is certainly not foolproof. As far as student-only cheating goes, the College Board has said that there are systems in place to prevent it, and they claim to have recently caught cheaters. But, in reality, the College Board would need impossible levels of surveillance set up to truly prevent cheating. Indeed, the federal government would not even have the Constitutional authority to do what the College Board claims it is doing. It may be a minority of students participating in such devious activities, but I assure you it is enough students to ruin the integrity of already shoddy examinations.
Exams are still full price: Each AP exam costs $94. That means you are spending over 2 dollars a minute to take an AP exam. Such value!

Look, I could go on (I did not even mention the problems students with learning differences are facing trying to get accommodations), but I hope you are awakened to at least some of the issues. The administration of this year’s AP examinations has been a serious misstep by the College Board. I do acknowledge that they are in an incredibly difficult spot, with a majority of students polled saying that they want to continue with the exams, but so much could have been done. When an organization essentially has a monopoly on the testing market, we should hold them to a higher standard.

Taking AP Exams Online – AP Coronavirus Updates | College Board

Awakening Editor: Quintus Ni

Air Fluffs

May 7, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org Leave a Comment

By Luke Langlois

When I was tasked with writing about happiness, I had no idea what to write about. Obviously, happiness is different for everyone, and, sometimes, we’re not even sure what happiness feels like when we truly are happy. So, I consulted an outsider, ex-blogger Claire Jenkins, for an idea. Being the purveyor of happiness and the pilot she is, she said to write about “clouds or something.” Perfect. While they are not going to buy you a new car, clouds are fascinating, and a beautiful strain of clouds is bound to make you stop and take a look. Moreover, unless you are fresh out of a science class (or pilot training), it is likely that you have forgotten your cloud types! Let us take a scientific look at the types of clouds that can roam the air with some lovely examples that hopefully make you want to look to the skies yourself.

Cumulus clouds are the “figurehead” of clouds. They are sometimes known as the “fair weather” cloud because they appear on clear, sunny days when the sun is able to heat the ground directly below. If you can see these clouds, be grateful because you are experiencing some swell weather.
Stratus clouds may not represent happiness to most of the world’s population because they cover up the sky and hang low. Luckily for us desert folk, stratus clouds represent light mist or a drizzle of rain, so they should represent happiness because everyone loves a bit of water.
Stratocumulus clouds are a bit of a hybrid between the above two (given the name). They cover the sky, but not as wholly as the stratus clouds. Stratocumulus clouds leave gaps in the sky where blue peeks through. These clouds are seen on days of low atmospheric convection.
Altocumulus clouds are smaller fluff puffs in the sky. They are often confused with stratocumulus, but they do not cover as much of the sky and the individual clouds are smaller. These are not a frequent sighting in the desert, as they usually appear on hot and humid days when a thunderstorm or cold front is to follow.
Nimbostratus clouds are THE rain or snow cloud. They’re dark, hazy, and ominous-looking, but they are absolutely majestic.
Cirrus clouds, Latin for “curl of hair” clouds, are thin wisps of ice crystals that streak above 20,000 feet (an altitude with low temperatures and low amounts of water vapor). They usually appear in fair weather, but they can indicate warm fronts or perhaps even a cyclone, not exactly a reliable measure of what is to come.
Cirrocumulus clouds cannot be well-described outside of a picture. They are small white patches of clouds that “live” in high altitudes like the cirrus clouds. Some say they look like small grains dotting the sky. These clouds tend to appear in cold, but fair, weather.
Cirrostratus clouds are white-ish and transparent clouds that cover the entire sky. It may be hard to identify the clouds by the clouds themselves, but cirrostratus clouds form a halo around the sun or moon due to the refraction of the light on the ice-crystals that make up the clouds. They indicate a large amount of moisture in the upper atmosphere or a potential warm front.
Cumulonimbus clouds are the proper behemoths of the cloud family. They are one of the few clouds that span the low, middle, and higher layers of the atmosphere. They generally resemble the cumulus clouds (from which they originate), but they rise and expand further upwards and downwards. These clouds are thunderstorm clouds and can indicate short periods of severe weather.
Bonus: Lenticular clouds are a rare formation, forming downwind of an “obstacle” in the path of a strong air current. They often form near mountainous regions because mountains can often be the “obstacle” required for formation.

If you have read this and are not a science teacher, pilot, or general cloud enthusiast, there is no doubt that you have learned something. Congratulations, you have officially had a productive day! I now encourage you to go outside and spot these clouds with your own eyes, predict the weather, or just relax. If it’s a cloudless sky, which it often seems to be as we descend into 100-degree weather, then you can go and be rightfully sad.

Source

https://scied.ucar.edu/learning-zone/clouds/cloud-types

Happiness Editor: Chelsea Xu

Nobody Knows

April 21, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org 2 Comments

With the coronavirus circulating the globe, Editor Doreen assigned the Blog Staff to write about “Doomsday.” Luke responds with a poem of sorts.

By Luke Langlois

How long will this quarantine last?

When will coronavirus reach its peak?

How dangerous is the virus to me?

If I get it, will I recover?

Which of these contrasting experts should I listen to?

When will a vaccine be widely available?

Will my family be alright?

Why is our government spending so much money?

Why is our government not spending enough money?

How will history look upon this moment?

Will we get an NBA champion?

Will that mom and pop pizza shop on my corner survive?

Can virtual classes really replace in-person classes?

Will seniors around the world get to step on their campus as students ever again?

Will seniors get to graduate?

How are seniors going to make the right decision without campus visits?

Are colleges going to start on time?

Will those below the poverty line be alright?

Are essential workers getting the support they need?

Will my nation’s economy recover?

Will the world economy recover?

Are we headed to the next Great Depression?

How will the 2020 Election work?

Do I still have a promising future?

What should I do during quarantine?

Is the world going to be the same when we get out of this?

Is there anyone that can answer these questions?

What is it that we can do?

This is not doomsday.

There is an end to this tunnel.

Thank your essential workers.

Support your local small businesses.

Keep your hands off your face.

Stay inside.

Stay safe.

Unite

and Endure.

Doomsday Editor: Doreen Yuan

Luke’s Ranking of his High-School Mandated Readings

April 2, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org 3 Comments

By Luke Langlois

Four years of English class gives students plenty of time to read plenty of books. Some were better than others. So, here is my mostly spoiler-free (for students who haven’t read these yet) ranking of high-school mandated readings. Stick around until the end to read up on the opinions of some other members of the senior class. Please note that this is opinion; these are all world-renowned works and enriching literature.

Image result for books

#19 – Amy Tan’s The Joy Luck Club: While The Joy Luck Club has a satisfying ending that will at least slightly touch anyone who’s ever had a family, the narrative style was not so satisfying (basically, a collection of short stories), and I never could connect to it. To be fair, the book revolves around Chinese American immigrant families and would likely mean much more to someone more culturally or circumstantially connected to the protagonists.

#18 – Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451: This was not technically a required class reading, but it was one of the summer reading options for AP English Language and almost everyone in my class picked it up, so it counts. The reason it is so low is because of the, ahem, great expectations I had for it. Fahrenheit 451 is just one of those books that is “hyped up” in the literary sphere, but it did not have the punch I expected when I read it.

#17 – Charles Dickens’s Great Expectations: This tale of wealth, poverty, love, and rejection is an all-time great bildungsroman (coming-of-age story), but there is just too much coming of age. It is just so long and dreadfully dull at times. I will say, however, that Dickens has to be a significant contributor to our knowledge of the Victorian Era as the way he wrote his settings in this novel, from the cabinets in the cabins to the bustle on the streets, left little to the imagination.

#16 – Christopher Marlowe’s Doctor Faustus: This play, while not exactly full of action, is given credit in my mind because of how aware you are of the “expiration date” on Doctor Faustus’s deal with the devil. What does a man look like when his eternal soul is running out of free time?

#15 – Niccolo Machiavelli’s The Prince: Perhaps if I was born five-hundred years earlier and into a royal family I would find more practical use out of this guide on how to rule your sovereign state. The historical value of this book outweighs its content.

#14 – Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray: There are three things I learned from this novel: the soul cannot be cleansed; you cannot hide from yourself; and don’t do drugs.

#13 – William Shakespeare’s Macbeth: The regicidal aspect of this play may not be applicable to today’s world, but I find value in Macbeth by comparing the plot to what happens when you lie. If you lie once, you have to keep lying, but that blood will never leave your hands.

#12 – William Golding’s Lord of the Flies: This novel forced me to take a long hard look at myself and humanity as a whole. I concluded that, yes, we do suck.

#11 – Isabel Allende’s The House of the Spirits: I have to say that this was one of the strangest novels I have read period. Allende seamlessly blends what is real with the magical elements of the novel as if the magic is not even there (thus the label of magical realism). The most intriguing part to me, though, is the portrayal of one of the United States’s not-so-great moments: putting authoritarian leader Pinochet into power in Chile. Isabelle Allende’s familial connection to the leader before Pinochet, Salvador Allende, adds more authenticity to it all.

#10 – Ernest Hemingway’s The Old Man and the Sea: A relatively short novel that depicts an old man wrestling with a large marlin off the coast of Cuba. It perfectly combines moments of extreme intensity (shark attack!) with the peace of fishing adrift in the ocean.

Image result for the old man and the sea

#9 – Fyodor Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment: A look into our human psyche that is entirely dreadful, but it’s a good type of dreadful. Like the characters in this novel, I felt like I was also living in a cramped Russian slum trapped inside of my head.

#8 – F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby: Many people would call this novel the most overrated out of these greats work, but I see it as a touching tragedy because, honestly, I rooted for Gatsby! Gatsby gave his heart and soul building an empire of wealth for his glimmering green light, but it was just out of reach.

#7 TIE – William Shakespeare’s Othello and Hamlet: There was nothing that particularly sticks with me about the meanings of these plays, but, when you read Shakespeare, you see bits and pieces of story elements, themes, and phrases that have survived the test of time and appear in our modern works. It’s quite cool!

#5 Alan Paton’s Cry, the Beloved Country: I know some of you may find this unusually high, but this novel made me want to take a trip to South Africa, even though the state of affairs there is depicted somewhat poorly here. I can attribute that to Paton’s description of the nation’s natural beauty. Plus, Stephen Kumalo is a universally likable protagonist.

Image result for cry the beloved country

#4 Khaled Hosseini’s A Thousand Splendid Suns: I am enthralled by this novel in the same way I am enthralled by Cry, the Beloved Country. Even though Hosseini portrays a war-torn Afghanistan where women suffer from heartbreaking abuse that is culturally ingrained, he still makes sure to look beyond the horrors and emphasize the natural human beauty that connects us all, regardless of culture.

#3 John Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men: Like Fahrenheit 451, this book is just one of those that is hyped up. Unlike Fahrenheit 451, it has the punch it needed. If you’ve read it, you know the one.

#2 Cormac McCarthy’s The Road: This story of a father and son journeying across post-apocalyptic America is devoid of anything even remotely close to happiness, warmth, life, or hope. That’s what makes it great. It is overwhelmingly grey, chilling, and depressing and is an excellent deterrent to nuclear warfare (even though the catastrophe that occurred is never revealed).

#1 Ralph Ellison’s Invisible Man: Again, this was an AP Lang reading option so most students have not read this one, but, as you can see by the ranking, I recommend you do so. The longer novels have not fared well on this list, but Invisible Man is a six-hundred-page beast that authentically documents every facet of the 20th-century strife of the African-American Harlem and broader American community. In this picaresque novel, the protagonist is never even given a name, but his experience with racially-driven brutality and his inability to find an identity (thus, the invisible man), made me more desperate to cheer for him than any other literary protagonist. The novel is dense and reading it is an investment of time, but it is time well spent for the historical and racial perspective.

Image result for invisible man ralph ellison

Does the senior class agree with me? Let’s find out. . .

Favorite High-School Mandated Reads:

Brennan Nick – Fahrenheit 451

Sydney Armor – A Thousand Splendid Suns

Shelby Armor – Of Mice and Men

Wilton Zuniga – Doctor Faustus

Charles Schnell – Crime and Punishment

Renee Vazquez – Othello?

Lawrence Nelson – Fahrenheit 451

Least Favorite High-School Mandated Reads:

Brennan Nick – The Old Man and the Sea

Sydney Armor – Doctor Faustus

Shelby Armor – The Road

Wilton Zuniga – The Prince

Charles Schnell – The Road

Renee Vazquez – Cry, the Beloved Country

Lawrence Nelson – The Joy Luck Club

Favorite Books Editor: James Zheng

Can We Truly Admire Historical Figures?

March 26, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org Leave a Comment

By Luke Langlois

Image result for ronald reagan black and white

Blog readers, as I am writing this, the world is practically on lockdown due to COVID-19 and, although we are still practicing distance learning, I find myself with quite a bit of time on my hands. If you happen to find yourself stuck at home, this is an excellent time to think about big questions and self-reflect. For example: if you were to become a historical figure, would you be an admirable one? While I am sure you would like the answer to be “Yes, of course!” you probably have some skeletons in your closet that would make it real difficult to like you if they were presented in a history textbook. Whether it is something you have said, done, believed, or some other personal vice, there has got to be something that is not likable about yourself.

I present this information not as a personal attack or something to lower your self-esteem, rather it is just a fact of the human condition. Nobody is perfect, and even if you believe you are, the definition of perfect varies by individual. But that’s a discussion for another time. Now, humans also have a tendency to admire other people. After all, we are social creatures. Furthermore, we tend to glorify people who have made their mark on our world and human history. The accomplishments of these historical figures are romanticized, and we make these people become “larger than life” with monuments, namings, movies, documentaries, etc. Yet, how are we supposed to look up to and, sometimes, even model ourselves after these figures if they are deeply flawed like the rest of us?

We all know by now that just about every President we have had has had some sort of nasty side, even though streets and cities around the country are named after them. Washington, Jefferson, and almost every President up to Ulysses S. Grant owned slaves. Ronald Reagan was recently revealed to have made racially insensitive comments in a phone call with President Nixon, who also chuckled at the joke (although he’s already not a very well liked man). More contemporarily, Barack Obama stated that he was against same-sex marriage all the way up to the 2008 election, a position he would now be chastised for amongst his supporters. While it is true that the office of President of the United States has been held by a limited demographic, to say the least, the point still stands for other often admired historical figures: people who have done great things have also done some not-so-great things. Nowadays, it seems that we walk on eggshells when it comes to these matters. If you admire a figure with some not-so-admirable traits, many people would argue that you subscribe to these beliefs and even enable these actions by looking up to the said figure.

One of the primary purposes of learning about history is to learn from our past mistakes. The problem many people have with history, though, is that it is difficult to make connections from past to present. It can be difficult to relate our modern information era to, say, the Gilded Age of the late 19th century. This is where historical figures come in. Although times may change, people have always been people. When we can relate to a figure and find a common point through our humanity, we can truly feel the enrichment of our history. If we scold ourselves for connecting with our historical figures, we risk severing ourselves from a meaningful connection with our past.

“No one is entirely good or entirely bad. Everyone has some good and some bad in them. Look at Franklin Delano Roosevelt. He certainly helped the United States get out of the Great Depression and was the president the country needed at the time. However, he was not perfect: he signed off [Executive Order 9066] on the Japanese internment camps, for instance.”

— Palm Valley Student Charles Schnell

Historical Figures Editor: Renée Vazquez

Best o’ the Blog

March 16, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org Leave a Comment

See what’s happening recently at thebirdonfire.org.

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FIREBIRD Letter to Palm Valley Community by Charles Schnell

Dear Palm Valley Community,

If someone asked you, “Who are you,” how would you respond? “I’m a. . .” Student? Parent? Teacher? Social worker? Musician? Politician? Doctor? Athlete? Farmer? Architect? Clown? . . . .

Ghost Hunting?!

By Luke Langlois Have you ever been trying to fall asleep at night when, suddenly, you hear a chilling whoooosh or an eerie creaking? Being the mature and fearless person you are, perhaps you brush these noises off as your cat doing cat things or the refrigerator… refrigerating. . . .

The Enchantment of Snowboarding

By James Zheng SYMPTOMS OF SNOWBOARDITIS

Being excessively elated over words associated with snow.
Desperately waiting for winter, not caring about the other 3 seasons.
Spending all time watching videos and reading articles about Snowboarding. (Symptoms worsen during winter.) . . . .

Ghost Hunting?!

March 6, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org 1 Comment

Editor Katelin assigned the Blog Staff to explore “Spirits.” Luke, with plans to go to college, has a Plan B–Ghost Hunting.–S.Z.

By Luke Langlois

Have you ever been trying to fall asleep at night when, suddenly, you hear a chilling whoooosh or an eerie creaking? Being the mature and fearless person you are, perhaps you brush these noises off as your cat doing cat things or the refrigerator… refrigerating. But, let’s be real. The thought has passed through your mind that these mysterious noises originate from a much more sinister source: spirits and ghosts. Although we may not know the intentions of these lost souls, do we want to be taking any risks that could land us on a one-way train to a similar state of being? Don’t just sit around and wait for the ghosts to get you; get up and go ghost hunting! In honor of the “spirit” theme, here are some basic tips for hunting the specters and phantoms creepily whirling around our mortal plane of existence.

Always Bring a Friend: Before you do anything, you must find a buddy to assist you in this ghost hunting endeavor. Working alone may sound appealing because, after all, it is what Batman does, but you are not Batman. If you’ve ever seen a horror movie, you would know that if you hunt alone, you may end up becoming the hunted. . . So, whether it’s your puppy, your goldfish, your ant colony, or your best friend Joe, you can find your strength in numbers, as long as you all are brave.
Do Your Research: When dealing with spirits, the element of surprise is on their side. You have no idea what the spirits may manifest themselves as! If you go hunting without knowing what threats the spirits pose, you may find yourself in a lethal situation. Ghosts were once living creatures themselves, and, like living creatures, each ghost is unique. Depending on your location, the type of ghost you encounter may be different. If your house was built on the site of a Mafia shootout, for example, you must be prepared for an aggressive and vengeful spirit.
Bring the Proper Equipment: Fending off the paranormal is not something you can do with just your hands and mental fortitude. Just like with any other activity, you will have more success hunting ghosts if you have the proper equipment, especially if that equipment is of a high-tier quality. For a ghost hunt, you will need a pen, paper, camera, flashlight, and a mobile phone. You will want concrete evidence when you find your ghost, and if you are unable to ward the ghost off the first time, you will have more information for your next attack. If you’re dealing with a more advanced ghost, you will want to look into digital laser thermometers to detect their spectral energy. Spooky!
Movies Are Not Reality: Just like with anything else, movies are not reality. Don’t believe that one viewing of Ghostbusters makes you an experienced ghost hunter. All of the ghosts in that movie are heavily exaggerated. The ghosts won’t typically be giant ectoplasmic monsters. Real ghost hunting can be boring, and sometimes you won’t find anything. Look, practicing your ghost hunting isn’t an exciting process ALL the time, but it is just so rewarding when it does pay off. Patience is key when hunting ghosts.

If you are afraid of ghosts, today is the best day to begin conquering your fear. If you learn to conquer the unseen, is there anything that could stop you? I think not! Begin your ghost hunting journey today…

*Luke does not condone hunting ghosts, nor does he hunt ghosts himself.

Spirit Editor: Katelin

Carpe Diem. . . and Other Latin Phrases to Say

March 3, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org 1 Comment

“Carpe Diem” Editor Quintus Ni says, “Don’t worry what will happen tomorrow; enjoy now; enjoy the moment.“

Luke says, “Thanks, Quintus. Good advice.” Now, follow it in Latin.

By Luke Langlois

Do you know why characters in movies and TV shows are so much more hip and cool than people are in actual day-to-day life? It’s one-liners. Unfortunately, saying one-liners in real life will probably not spark the reaction that they do in movies. Instead, people may look at you and ask why you are speaking exclusively in witty, planned responses. But, what if you decide to start saying Latin one-liners? Would you be able to Latin-one-line your way into a promotion? Is there anything better than the dying language of what used to be one of the largest empire the world has ever seen? Enough with the rhetorical questions; here are some Latin one-liners that may help you be the mightiest around. Please note that a pronunciation guide isn’t included, just sound it out, or something.

Lupus non timet canem latrantem: A wolf is not afraid of a barking dog. If you’re ever being relentlessly insulted by someone, this should be your go-to catchphrase. Depending on your tone, you may be asking for a fight.
Ad meliora: Toward better things. Did you just drop your $1,000 iPhone on the asphalt and have it promptly shatter? Ad meliora, for when your day isn’t going well, but you know that better things await.
Faber est suae quisque fortunae: Every person is the artisan of their own fortune. If you ever feel like life is just not going your way and that things could be better, remember this phrase. Craft your future!
Audentes fortuna iuvat: Fortune favors the bold. Obviously, you’ve heard this one before, but have you ever seen it in Latin? As cliche as it is, life won’t just happen to you; YOU happen to life. Be bold.
Carpe diem: Seize the day. Yeah, yeah, we all know this one, but it’s Quintus’s theme, so I had to include it. It’s not half bad advice, you know.
Carpe vinum: Seize the wine. For you over 21-ers, this is a fun alternative to carpe diem when you really don’t feel like seizing the day.
Acta deos numquam mortalia fallunt: Mortal actions never deceive the gods. Honestly, parents should use this line more. If they know their kid is stealing candy from the candy jar, they should use this phrase and strike fear into their child’s heart forever.
Ad astra per aspera: Through adversity to the stars. This is one of the more common phrases on the list, but that does not detract from its coolness factor. When you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, whether it be an essay or a drive home that seems extra long, remember that you are well on your way to the stars. If you’re an astronaut, feel free to take this literally!
Dulce periculum: Danger is sweet. Feeling edgy today? Dulce periculum!
Aquila non capit muscas: The eagle does not catch flies. Basically, this phrase is used when you are feeling too mighty to be dealing with petty matters. Perhaps you are the CEO of a multibillion-dollar company and someone asks you to make some copies for them. The eagle does not catch flies! Be wary, though. If you use this phrase too much, people will just dislike you.
Flectere si nequeo superos, Acheronta movebo: If I cannot move Heaven, I will raise Hell. If you’re looking for a good hook for your triumphant supervillain monologue, this might be it.
Fere libenter homines id quod volunt credunt: Men generally believe what they want to believe. Do you want to cleanly win and end an argument at the same time? Use this phrase. Your opponent (likely) won’t understand you, but you’ll know that you have left them with a zinger.
Ars longa, vita brevis: Art is long, life is short. If you’re working on the next great American novel, but people aren’t supporting you in your endeavor and think it’s a waste of time, hit them with ars longa, vita brevis.
Aut viam inveniam aut faciam: I will either find a way or make one. While this can be used for some self-motivation, it can also be used for vague threats. Try it out!
Factum fieri infectum non potest: It is impossible for a deed to be undone. Think before you act, now in Latin.

Carpe Diem Editor Quintus Ni

Save The Mock Trial Team!

February 14, 2020 by szachik@pvs.org 5 Comments

By Luke Langlois

When Chelsea said the theme was “winter sports,” I figured that I would write up another post about hockey. Unfortunately, the only thing going on in the NHL is the same old regular season of play. There’s nothing particularly interesting about the middle of the season (unless you are an avid fan of hockey, which I still encourage you to be). So, why not write about my other favorite winter sport, MOCK TRIAL?! Yes. It counts. As a participant, I may be biased with this statement, but Mock Trial is easily one of the most underrated clubs at Palm Valley. If you are not sure what exactly Mock Trial is, I encourage you to check out my post linked below that I wrote all the way back in November of 2018. The current problem with Mock Trial at Palm Valley, though, is that seven out of our eleven members are seniors. We only have two juniors, two sophomores, and no freshmen. If something does not change, there will be no team next year.

Here’s why Mock Trial is great. It’s too late to join this year, as competitions started on February 6th, but keep an eye out for it next year. Here are just a few of the many reasons why Mock Trial should be in your future if you are a 9-12th grader.

The cases are always very well-written and fun to read, from the fact-situation (the stone-cold truths of the case) to the often contradictory witness statements. The committee who writes the cases has to make sure that both a prosecution and defense team can make a solid argument from the case with no side having more power than the other. As such, the cases are never simple and are full of nuance. Every detail is meticulously placed, and it always feels like you’re missing something. Essentially, there is never a dull moment when discussing the case.
The “officials” who moderate competitions are real legal professionals. All of the scoring attorneys are bar-certified, and the judges are either active judges or retired judges. A competition will never be presided over by someone who is not expertly qualified to do so. They’re also all voluntarily offering their time, so they usually are not cruel and jaded people who just want to go home. Few other extracurriculars allow you to interact with true experts in the field.
You get to learn about United States law. The core intention of Mock Trial is to teach the students about the law of the United States, court proceedings, what exactly is needed to find someone guilty of alleged crimes, and more. However, this does not mean that Mock Trial is only for students looking for a career in law. Besides learning about the law, you learn some lessons in being an effective public speaker and thinking on your feet when matters don’t go exactly as planned. These are invaluable life skills! While people with theater backgrounds often constitute a big part of the Mock Trial team, that certainly isn’t a requirement, and you can thrive without any knowledge of performance. Plus, with knowledge of the law, you can look at things with a legal eye and not just rely on the often incorrect “court of public opinion.”
You get to dress nicely. Palm Valley polos are great and all, but how often do you really get razzle-dazzled up and burst into a courtroom with pride. Not very often, I’d wager. Speaking of courtrooms, in Mock Trial, you get to compete where the magic happens. When you walk into a courtroom, you instantly feel like you have become a person of high status and class. It’s not Disneyland, but the courtrooms are magnificently structured, and the Great Seal of the State of California “looking over” every courtroom makes me even feel a bit patriotic. There’s a lot of history in that Seal!

Juggling schoolwork, clubs, and sports is already super difficult, so why not add Mock Trial to that mix? Seriously, though, it may be tough to add something else to your schedule, but I can (almost) guarantee that you will not regret joining Mock Trial. Riches in the forms of award medals are also available if you happen to have the talent. . .

Find my previous post “Mock Trial Explained” Below

Mock Trial: EXPLAINED!

Winter Sports Editor: Chelsea