Op-Ed Archives - Page 3 of 9 - the bird on fire

Controversial Sports Opinions Likely to Get Me Into a Fight

October 19, 2023 by ehesson@pvs.org Leave a Comment

Blog staffers are exploring “Controversial/Unpopular Opinions.” They ask “What’s Your Hill to Die On?” They argue for Joe Biden grabbing that second term. They admit to liking Dr. Pepper. Oliver has some hard-and-fast opinions on sports. Oliver loves sports. Oliver knows sports. And, here, he’s not afraid to share his (unpopular?) opinion on some famous sports figures and sports events.

By Sophomore Oliver Martinez

I’ve watched sports since I was a little kid. I generally enjoy watching; however, there are certain ideas or opinions that I just don’t agree with. So, here, I’ve compiled a brief list of my opinions on sports most likely to get me into a fight. For now, I’m talking about basketball and football/soccer.

LeBron is better than MJ

Okay, so there are many reasons as to why I believe LeBron James is better than Michael Jordan.

First reason, LeBron led an awful, losing Cavaliers team to the finals in his first years at the Cavaliers. Michael Jordan did none of that until he got his Bulls super team in 1991 with the likes of Scottie Pippen and Horace Grant. When LeBron made his first finals, who was the best player next to him? Drew Gooden? Not to mention LeBron was playing one of the best San Antonio teams ever assembled with Tim Duncan, Tony Parker, and Manu Ginobili. Also, let’s not forget that Michael Jordan got even more amazing players added to his team. In 1996, he came back to the best team ever assembled with the likes of Scottie Pippen, Dennis Rodman, Steve Kerr, Toni Kukoc, Ron Harper-–the list goes on. No kidding: he was going to win a championship. With a team like that, not winning a championship would be embarrassing. The point is, LeBron made more finals playing for a bad team while playing against amazing teams. MJ needed a super team to succeed.

Reason 2: On top of the championship’s success, LeBron has surpassed MJ in just about every category. He has 6,000 more points than MJ (NBA.com). LeBron has double the amount of assists. LeBron has more rebounds and more blocks as well. Point is, he’s better at almost everything.

Reason 3: One more interesting thing I want to mention is that when LeBron was drafted by the Cavaliers, the Cavs hadn’t made the playoffs for four years. LeBron sent them to the finals in just four years. A couple years later he proceeded to make it all the way to the NBA Finals eight times in a row, from 2011-2018. LeBron joined the Lakers in 2019. At the time, the Lakers hadn’t even made the playoffs for six years and were last place in their conference. However, after just two years of LeBron being with the Lakers, they won a championship. LeBron is simply the better player. I’m not taking any credit away from MJ; he was a fantastic player and is easily in the top three of all time, but he required a super team to gain success, and LeBron proved he didn’t. Championship success isn’t everything there is to basketball, and flashy scoring doesn’t make you a better overall player.

LeBron and Curry could’ve been the best NBA rivalry IF it hadn’t been for Durant

I was just thinking about this the other day, and it makes so much sense. From 2015 and on, Curry and LeBron were at their peak, and watching them play was magical. They made the finals and the games so exciting. These were close, hard-fought games. LeBron had just returned to the Cavs and was giving it his all to get the Cavs their first chip. Curry and LeBron met in the finals in 2015. It ended with Golden State and Steph Curry winning the series 4-2, but it was close and an exciting matchup. In 2016, it was even better, the Warriors held a 3-1 lead over LeBron’s Cavs, making it almost impossible for the Cavs to come back, but they miraculously did. In fact, they came back to win their first-ever championship. These years were some of the best in the NBA. But, in 2017, everything was ruined. The Warriors went on a huge signing spree. Their most remarkable signings were Andre Iguodala, JaVale McGee, Shaun Livingston, and, the worst of all, Kevin Durant. This automatically not only made them the absolute best team in the NBA but possibly the best team ever. After that, there was virtually no hope for the LeBron-Curry rivalry to continue. Both their teams made the finals again twice, but the Cavs were literally shredded. Hence, ended the legendary rivalry between LeBron and Curry. Thankfully, Draymond Green had a fight with KD and this marked the date that KD left the Warriors – ending the Warriors’ absolute dominance of the league.

Oliver has a *few* basketball jerseys at home. Pictured are just his favorites.

. . . moving now to Soccer/Football . . .

The 2022 FIFA World Cup was rigged

Yup, you read that right. The 2022 FIFA World Cup was rigged! Here is my reasoning:

Reason 1: I will start off simple. Argentina won with five penalties to their favor. Argentina scored off most of these penalty kicks (fourfourtwo.com). Five penalties doesn’t sound like that much, until you realize that teams that make it to the finals play a total of seven games. There were more games where Argentina’s opponents were penalized than games that were penalty free. We haven’t seen this many penalties in finals since 1966 and 1978.

Second reason why the FIFA 2022 World Cup was Rigged: Who was the referee in the final? According to FIFA, the referee for the final is picked at random from all eligible referees in the World Cup. But, FIFA picked Polish referee Szymon Marciniak to referee the final…. This was a potential conflict of interest. Why? Because who eliminated Poland? France. And it was France who was playing Argentina in the Final. Think about it? Who was hating on France . . . ?

Reason three: FIFA needs money. As much as I hate to admit it, I believe FIFA is corrupt. This was evident from the moment FIFA picked Qatar to be World Cup hosts. Countries put bids in to be hosts. Wrote The New York Times of Qatar as host: “The United States Department of Justice on Monday said for the first time that representatives working for Russia and Qatar had bribed FIFA officials to secure hosting rights for the World Cup in men’s soccer” (nytimes.com). My theory? FIFA rigged the World Cup final to be Argentina vs any other team because FIFA knew that Argentina was the team that would generate tons of money. Just imagine, if the final had been Croatia vs Netherlands – virtually no one would have watched it, but since the Final included Argentina and Lionel Messi, it was the best way FIFA could get millions, maybe even billions of people to watch it.

My fourth and last reason as to why the 2022 World Cup was rigged is that FIFA needed to complete and pad the world-famous Messi trophy cabinet–which leads me to my next controversial opinion.

Messi is not the best player of all time

Sure, Messi is a good player. However, he is not the best. Here are some reasons as to why there are better players.

Reason 1: Messi joined Barcelona in 2004. There is proof of Barcelona paying the refs from 2001 all the way until 2018. According to Fox Sports, FC Barcelona paid a total of 7.3 million euros in the span of 18 years to José María Enríquez Negreira, who was vice president of the refereeing committee in Spain at the time. I would conclude that most of the trophies won in those years are rubber trophies (foxsports.com).

Reason 2: I think that another reason people really say that Messi is the best of all time is because they hear others say that, and also because the 2022 FIFA World Cup is the most watched ever as it has been the most televised. I believe that since this was the most accessible World Cup, most people who haven’t watched before just naturally assume that the winners are the best and that their best player is the best, which seems natural to think but isn’t necessarily true.

Reason 3: With the popularization of Soccer/Football in the U.S., Americans (for the most part), are just going with the flow (which is fine and understandable), but had they done a little digging, they would realize there are players who have done so much more for the game – like Pelé, or Maradona or even Zidane. Pelé won three World Cups, the only player to ever do so. According to the Guinness Book of World Records, Pelé has the most goals ever with 1,279. Pelé scored hundreds more than even Ronaldo or Messi. He never had to play in Europe to prove he was the best. He played in friendlies against the top teams in the world back then and won. He was an elite goalscorer from anywhere in the field. And he did this back in the 50s, the 60s, and the 70s. Just imagine what he could have done if he had the technology of today.

Truth be told, I know no one will change their opinions because I wrote an article about my controversial takes on sports. But, if you want to contribute your controversial takes on sports, feel free to do so in the comments.

Best of Blog ‘22-23

May 23, 2023 by ehesson@pvs.org 1 Comment

By Junior Luke Sonderman

It is the end of the school year, and we have written a lot of interesting blog articles. We have had returning blog writers, new blog writers, and even some guest bloggers throughout this school year. I am excited to bring to you my personal rating of this year’s blog articles!

1. “Teacher Madlib Video” by Levi Kassinove and Luke Sonderman

As much as I hate to nominate my own blog article out as the #1 of the year, I have to give the #1 spot the “Teacher Madlib Video” I did with Levi. This video blog consisted of nearly 100 videos of teachers saying random adjectives, nouns, and verbs that all fit into a Madlib-style story created by Levi and me. When this video launched from The Bird on Fire, the viewership was hot. Everyone was talking about the outrageous story we created using the words of Palm Valley’s very own teachers. If you want to see this video, visit thebirdonfire.org.

2. “Stop Taking Your Pets Everywhere!” by Indy Behr

My selection for the second best blog article of the year goes to Indy Behr for “Stop Taking Your Pets Everywhere!” This blog article started an absolute riot in the comment section, and anyone who has read my articles knows that I am one for chaos and controversy. In this article, Indy discusses the dangers of allowing emotional support animals in public spaces. In a lengthy evidence-supported response to Indy’s article, Palm Valley Alumnus Luke Langlois said, “You use anecdotal evidence and buzzwords like scientific evidence to deny the one true motivation behind this post: you are a dog HATER.” In defense, Indy responded to Luke saying, “For the record, its[sic] pretty clear your argument is shaky when you attack my motivation and falsely accuse me, someone who very much appreciates dogs, of being a dog hater.” As tensions and tempers arise, Blogger Levi Kassinove responds to Indy’s comment with “*It’s” to correct Indy’s improper grammar. The comment section was almost more entertaining than the article! If you want to read the article and the battle in the comments, visit thebirdonfire.org.

3. “Steak of the Gods–Wagyu” by Levi Kassinove

One of the most popular articles of the year is my #3 choice, “Steak of the Gods–Wagyu,” by Levi Kassinove. I, myself, have never tried Wagyu, but after reading this article I almost feel like I have. Levi says that when you take a bite “it’s like a hedonist party in your mouth.” And, yes, he used the right form of “it’s.” Aside from making my mouth water, this article was a hit in student life! Walking through campus, I would hear Wagyu this, Wagyu that. I had never even heard of Wagyu until Levi told me about it! Even teachers were asking Levi about Wagyu during class! If you want to have a “hedonist party in your mouth,” visit thebirdonfire.org.

4. “Dear Marley” by Jess Billimore

Although this article is what I consider a “cop out” (a minimal effort article that scores a good grade with Ms. Zachik, our blog advisor), I have put it on this list because of its widespread popularity. In this article, Jess gathered questions that various staff and students had for her chihuahua, Marley, and answered them from the point of view of her dog. So when you read this article, realize that Marley isn’t actually a talking dog, and, no, she didn’t actually answer these questions. Marley was a hit in the Upper, Middle, and even Lower School! The mother of Palm Valley 1st grader Natalie responded to the article saying, “Our Natalie loved reading this 🙂 thank you.” To view Marley (not actually) respond to Palm Valley’s questions, visit thebirdonfire.org.

5. “An Ode To Levi’s Hoodie” by Indy Behr

Last but not least, my #5 pick again goes to Indy Behr–this time with “An Ode To Levi’s Hoodie.” In this article Indy discusses Levi’s treasured $139 hoodie made from alpaca fur. Indy even quoted me as I nicknamed Levi “Princess Levi” for his outrageous bougieness that was only topped off by this ridiculous hoodie. I mean come on, the guy eats $100+ Wagyu steaks. Like most of the articles on this list, it was a hit in the Middle and Upper School. Levi was getting questions left and right about his hoodie that Indy discussed in the article. After a week of Levi getting away with wearing this out-of-dress-code hoodie, Head of School Dr. Sherman told Levi to go back to wearing a school sweatshirt. To hear more about Indy’s obsession with Levi, visit thebirdonfire.org.

It has been a fun year in Blog, full of great articles by our various blog writers, but it is time to say goodbye. Hopefully, you will hear more from me next year if I return to the blog staff, but until then… adios, 再見, au revoir, הֱיה שלום, さようなら, ลาก่อน, до свидания, and goodbye.

Would YOU eat ethical fish eggs???

April 20, 2023 by ehesson@pvs.org Leave a Comment

By Junior Levi Kassinove

Hello. Today I’m going to tell you a little tale about…caviar–otherwise known as the cured eggs of the sturgeon fish.

Caviar in the 19th Century

Man devouring 70K worth of caviar in seconds (grubstreet.com)

Let us travel back to the 1800s, when caviar was eaten by the bowlful by even the poorest of peasants. It was cheap and abundant, like lobster once was, which was fed to prisoners and slaves. During this time, the Russian Empire was the largest exporter of caviar in the world. They were pretty much the only producer (solexcatsmo.com). Then, the rest of Europe and the US started producing caviar. Soon, every American diner was giving caviar away as free appetizers. People were obsessed with it. There was demand, but it was still cheap. Even in the 1970s, caviar was only $60-70 per pound (nytimes.com). Comparatively, the lowest quality caviar is now upwards of $1000 per pound today (bestercaviarstore.com). What REALLY caused the upsurge in price was the immense overfishing of sturgeon. Multiple species of sturgeon declined in population, with the popular beluga sturgeon suffering the worst. It is now listed as a “critically endangered” species by the IUCN. As a result, the illegality of fishing for the beluga sturgeon caused caviar industries to turn to farming, making wild-caught sturgeon extremely valuable. But, we don’t have to kill the sturgeon to enjoy the eggs any more…

How We Can Harvest Caviar Today

Female sturgeon getting an ultrasound (caviarstar.com)

Whereas the traditional method for extracting caviar involved cutting the fish’s stomach open and ripping its guts out, the stripping method is much more ethical. One method involves simply injecting the sturgeon with a hormone that separates the eggs from their connective tissue, and then massaging the eggs out of the sturgeon a few days later. This method does not kill the fish, and even allows the sturgeon to produce more eggs in the future. An ultrasound is used to determine the optimal time to perform the procedure. By harvesting the caviar without killing the fish, we can slowly repair the damage done to the sturgeon population due to overfishing. (ift.org)

But How Does It Taste?

Stylish caviar tasting (nailsbyshurik.wordpress.com)

There is a MASSIVE difference between fake caviar (bowfin fish eggs) and real caviar (sturgeon eggs). Bowfin is a bony fish that yields small, dark, red-tinted roe (caviarstar.com). Bowfin is a cheaper and easier-to-produce alternative to caviar. Even according to the Food and Drug Administration, “real” caviar comes only from sturgeon (ift.org). I’m not gonna talk about the red eggs because that’s not caviar either, although salmon roe is pretty good. A good way to spot the difference between real caviar and bowfin eggs is simply to look at the price. If you see a jar of black “caviar” being sold for $10-15, it’s fake. Bowfin also has much smaller eggs than sturgeon. The bowfin eggs will taste overly salty and fishy, giving you a terribly inaccurate impression of caviar. Real caviar is absolutely delicious. It’s subtle. Sturgeon eggs are creamy, nutty, and only slightly salty. If it tastes fishy, there’s something wrong with it.

I highly recommend that you all try caviar at least once. And, if you can, make sure that the caviar was ethically produced. As they say in Russia, do svidaniya!

Fireworks: Boom or Bust?

April 5, 2023 by ehesson@pvs.org Leave a Comment

While we’re well past New Year’s and still months away from the 4th of July, Louisa says it’s never too early or too late to consider the wisdom of igniting the skies with fireworks.

An Op-Ed by 8th-Grader Louisa Richardson

I have a question, one that seems to be quite controversial: Are fireworks a good thing? Is a moment of “Ah!” worth the trauma they cause?

Personally, I think that fireworks should be illegal. They are bad for war veterans (MIlitary Vets), PTSD victims (Coping With PTSD), and animals (Humane Society). Here are several reasons why fireworks are bad in general.

My first reason as to why fireworks are bad is because of how difficult it is to find an article on why fireworks are a good thing. The first things that come up when you type in “fireworks” in your search bar include . . .

fireworks are bad

fireworks are stupid

fireworks are illegal

fireworks are bad for the environment

When you hit “Enter,” a bunch of injuries come up. Headlines read: “Don’t Blow It This Fourth Of July because Fireworks Are Illegal In City Limits!” If you click on an article such as “Don’t Blow It . . . ,” you often see accident stories and statistics involving fireworks, which brings me to my point, safety (cityofredlands.org). The city of Redlands cites “More than 16,000 fires and almost 9,000 emergency room visits are associated with fireworks nationally each year” (cityofredlands.org).

Fireworks are very dangerous; this may seem obvious as they are literal exploding sticks of fire, but apparently not obvious to everyone. One of the most obvious things that gets ignored when discussing fireworks is the danger to personal property. It would be wise, of course, to light fireworks away from one’s house. However, even one of my very intelligent blog colleagues, Levi Kassinove, has lit them in front of his house. Levi’s stories of fireworks include how his cousin almost killed his family with a held-upside-down firework that somehow lit nothing on fire, and how his neighbors once lit a tree on fire with a firework. People often don’t respect firework safety because it gives them a better view, or a better time! I understand the desire to have fun with fireworks, but that doesn’t mean abusing safety rules, and risking the safety of yourself and those around you, which usually leads to injuries or death.

Injuries and death due to fireworks are far more common than they should be. In the year 2021, in the weeks surrounding the Fourth of July, it was estimated by the United States CONSUMER PRODUCT SAFETY COMMISSION that there were 1,500 injuries due to fireworks and 1,100 due to sparklers (CPSC.gov). The simple answer to this problem would be to follow safety regulations, but people are very silly and sometimes unintelligent–not only that but accidents can still happen. Deaths due to fireworks can happen pretty much anywhere: nightclubs, Fourth of July celebrations, just at home, and even churches.

Another issue with fireworks is that they can be very frightening to certain groups. Fireworks often sound like gunshots to veterans, victims of shootings, and just people who have a phobia of guns. Many folks have been through horrible things, and is it really worth it to have them go through it all over again for something like one minute of happiness? The sound frightens some, but so does the smell. Fireworks smell like the aftermath of a bomb to some veterans (US Department of Veterans Affairs). We don’t want to remind people of awful episodes just because kids like the pretty light show.

I’m sure that we have all seen or experienced a dog flipping out because of fireworks nearby. One thing you may not know is that all animals fear fireworks. Animals aren’t used to having giant booming noises above their habitat, and this can make them really terrified. Dogs hide under couches of course, but not every animal has the luxury of a couch to filter the noise. There is a very simple fix to this problem.

Drone firework shows are becoming more and more frequent as a substitute for real fireworks. They aren’t bad for the environment; they aren’t bad for veterans, and they aren’t bad for animals.

In conclusion, just because I hate fireworks, doesn’t mean I want to rob others the happiness of a light show. I encourage all of these firework fanatics to sit back and enjoy a drone fireworks show some time. They can be even better than fireworks!

This is an example of a drone firework show in Shanghai (Drone Fireworks).

Why Lindsay Lohan’s “The Parent Trap” is the Greatest Movie Ever Made and Often the Most Misunderstood

March 16, 2023 by ehesson@pvs.org Leave a Comment

By Junior Indiana Behr

I know that’s a long title, but hear me out. My favorite movie of all time is the 1998 version of The Parent Trap. I think it is genuinely flawlessly crafted. It incorporates elements of a classic romantic comedy, but the dramatic elements are also done well. It may be a Disney movie, but there is no doubt this film can be enjoyed by people of all ages. I think that it is also misinterpreted by most people who watch this film. I think that the character often viewed as the villain, Meredith Blake–the stepmother-to-be, is not a villain at all, and is a much more complex and layered character than one might think after the first watch. I argue that the twins are actually the villains of this film.

Why The Parent Trap (1998) is the Best Movie Ever Made

I genuinely do not enjoy a single movie more than I enjoy The Parent Trap. This film is of course a remake of a film of the same name that was released in 1961. I have seen the 1961 version a few times, and I think it is a very well made movie. However, I actually think the 1998 film is an improvement upon the original. Most Disney remakes are pretty underwhelming, especially the ones that turned animated movies into live action. I feel like this version is an exception.

It may be inspired by an older movie, but the creators of the remake were willing to make any changes they felt necessary to keep the story fresh and contemporary, and I felt like it was successful. In the original film, both twins were from different parts of the United States. In the remake, Hallie is from Napa, California, all the way in the Western US, while Annie is from London, England. I think this makes the culture shock more significant, as it is two different countries rather than just two regions of the US.

I find Hayley Mills’ performance in the 1961 movie to be very good, but I find Lindsay Lohan’s performance to be even more impressive. Lindsay Lohan was just 11 during filming for the 1998 film; whereas Mills was already 15 during production. Additionally, Lohan had to learn an accent from an entirely different country, and I think she did so skillfully. Mills only had to learn the accent of another region of the US. I also generally think the other performances in the 1998 version, such as the butler and housekeeper, were better, and I think the humor has stood the test of time better than the predecessor.

Another reason I really like this movie is the music. I think the soundtrack of this film is excellent. The opening credits that show a montage of the twins’ parents meeting on the Queen Elizabeth 2 ocean liner set to Nat King Cole’s L-O-V-E is probably my favorite movie opening ever. Whether it’s the suspenseful music heard during the scenes at the summer camp in the beginning or the Beatles’ Here Comes the Sun when Hallie (pretending to be Annie) helps her mother, Elizabeth James, at her fashion business, I think that the music is perfectly done from beginning to end.

Why the Twins Are Actually the Villains and Meredith Blake Wasn’t Actually That Bad

Both versions of The Parent Trap have the repeatedly used evil step-mother trope, but part of why I prefer the 1998 edition is because I think the character of Meredith Blake was a much more complex and layered character than Vicky Robinson, her 1961 equivalent. Over the last few years, many others have come to this conclusion, and in 2022, Elaine Hendrix, who portrayed Meredith Blake, stated that she sympathized with her character. She even made a TikTok with the caption, “He had twins he secretly separated at birth when he broke up with their mother and didn’t tell you about it until the twins discovered each other at camp and swapped places to try and get their parents back together.” Really makes you think, huh? Maybe the twins and their father were the villains more than Meredith…

I am not going to lie to you, when I first watched this film, I thought of Meredith Blake as a classic Disney villain, but after hearing others’ opinions and watching it again, I have started to understand Meredith Blake’s actions. Even after they first meet, Annie, pretending to be Hallie, is incredibly passive aggressive towards her, intentionally splashing her with water by aggressively jumping into her pool, and then blatantly lying by calling her “number twenty-nine” when it had already been established she was the first relationship her father, Nick Parker, had entered since the twins’ birth. Then, after Annie describes this interaction by phone, Hallie states, “Well, you’ll just have to break ’em up. Sabotage her. Do whatever you have to.”

When I advocate to others that Meredith Blake was not actually as bad as she is made out to be, their rebuttal is often that she stated that she wanted to send Annie to boarding school. However, I think this was just hyperbole, especially considering she never seemed to make any effort to go through with it. I do not think you can blame her for being somewhat angry about her boyfriend’s daughter being incredibly nasty towards her after meeting just once.

Once the twins successfully get their parents to reunite in San Francisco, the twins and their parents go back to Napa where their father lives after Hallie convinces them to go on their annual camping trip with her father. However, before leaving, Elizabeth, not a fan of the outdoors, tells Nick that she thinks it would be better if Meredith went instead. The twins were unsurprisingly unhappy with this, but Elizabeth insisted. Then, during this trip, the twins are horrifically cruel towards her. They put a lizard on her head, which crawls into her mouth first. Then, they give her sugar water claiming it will help with mosquitoes, and tell her that whacking two sticks together will scare off the mountain lions. There were in fact no mountain lions where they were camping.

Then, after all of this, the twins do something that ultimately destroys Meredith and Nick’s relationship. They take Meredith’s air mattress from her tent, and place it in the lake at the camping site, and she floats away asleep, only to wake up in the morning in the middle of the lake. First of all, this is obviously just a horrible thing to do to someone. Second of all, this is dangerous! Falling into the middle of a river when you are asleep could very well cause drowning. After this, Meredith approaches Nick and says he has to pick between the twins and her. I think him picking the kids was obviously the right decision, but I very much sympathize with her.

Overall, I recognize Meredith Blake is kind of aggressive at times, but I also think she is a very determined character who knows what she wants. I think it’s fair to say that money may be a part of her interest in Nick, but I do not think he was oblivious to this, and I do think she probably liked him. This very complex character is part of why I like this movie so much, and why I prefer it over the original movie. I think you should try watching or rewatching The Parent Trap (1998) with this perspective in mind.

Stop Taking Your Pets Everywhere!

February 16, 2023 by ehesson@pvs.org 10 Comments

By Indy Behr (who, it should be noted, thinks his cats are cool–but not transportable)

The Blog Staff opted to take a deep dive into Pets. While several of our bloggers write with great affection and sentimentality about pets, Indy has a . . . pet-peeve. He doesn’t want to see your pets in public.

Over the last few years, I have observed an incredibly frustrating trend.

People have started to feel comfortable bringing their pets everywhere, especially dogs. I genuinely cannot walk down the aisle of a grocery store without walking next to a mini poodle. I once witnessed a small dog defecate in the aisle of a Gelson’s. I have never been all that much of a dog person, but, if I encounter a dog in my neighborhood, I will absolutely tolerate it. However, now people can take their pets on AIRPLANES without cages for “emotional support.”

I would firstly like to make a very clear distinction: service animals for those with visual impairments and/or other physical disabilities are entirely necessary, and I will never have any issue with them being wherever they need to be. Service dogs are considered something that most places are rightfully required to allow by the Americans with Disabilities Act. However, ada.gov publicly states that “emotional support dogs” are not service animals, period. Service dogs are required to be trained. With training, they don’t bother others or lick them at random. I know there are some people reading this who are going to think how insensitive I am, but I am not the only one saying this. I am sure for many people your flight or trip to the grocery store will be more fun with your dog, but that does not make bringing Fido along a medical necessity.

When airlines let untrained dogs sit out in the open on planes, it can be downright dangerous. One man needed twenty-eight stitches after an emotional support Labrador attacked him on a Delta flight from Atlanta to San Diego. And, now, there’s a get-around even for airlines that require documentation stating pets are necessary. Many websites will let you pay and get a “certificate” that makes your pet an emotional support pet. This can include pigs. This can include, somehow, horses. You can say that you have panic attacks without your duck on planes, and, bam, you are able to fly across the country holding a bird in your hands that can poop and quack whenever it wants.

The whole idea of emotional support animals being helpful in almost any case has nearly no scientific evidence. The Journal of Applied Developmental Science has said the only research on this issue is much too early to reach any conclusion (washingtonpost.com). Previous studies often had other issues–like not controlling other causes for increased or decreased stress in the presence of animals. I don’t think that we should be letting emotional support animals everywhere until we know they actually work.

If you are reading this and thinking, “But I know my dog makes me happy!”–I am not doubting that this is the case, but if there is still no actual evidence that your dog does things like lower anxiety in the long term, I do not think it is worth it to allow your untrained dog into all public areas. If you are considering paying someone online to say that your animal is for emotional support just because you want to take them out in public, please do not.

Sorry, “affogato” your name

January 24, 2023 by ehesson@pvs.org 1 Comment

The Blog Staff, united in its passion for that morning drink so many of us (especially Indy) can’t do without, celebrates coffee this week. Penny, however, voices a different opinion.

By Middle-Schooler Penny Andreas

(If you love coffee, prepare to be offended.)

From cold brew, to de-caf, to your extra tall carmel macchiato with 2 teaspoons of creamer with just a hint of sugar along with the smiley face on top, I dislike coffee. For the most part, I think coffee is gross and disgusting.

First, what actually is coffee? If you think about it…It’s ground up beans that are served hot. Some people even add flavors like “pumpkin spice,” along with cream. I don’t know about you, but beans with creamy chemical flavoring are disgusting. Also, What is the smell? To me it absolutely smells like burning rubber, or dry desert dirt. Both are gross.

Second, the taste is the most revolting, sickening, repulsive, icky, gut-churning, and monstrous thing I have ever tasted in my entire life. It tastes extremely bitter, even with (I promise) two cups of creamer. I swear every type tastes like the specific definition of dust and dirt. No matter how many types of coffee I have tried, I find almost no difference except the fact that some are spicy…which has been somewhat concerning to me.

Third, there are actually hazardous things when it comes to drinking the beans! Consuming and drinking too much coffee can lead to nervousness, addiction, frequent urination, or not being able to control urinating. Is coffee worth the risk of peeing your pants in public? I didn’t think so. However, there are some health benefits that coffee can give you, but that’s only if you don’t put a quart of creamer and a cup of sugar in your coffee. It can help you prevent cancers, heart diseases, and depression (hsph.harvard.edu). But note, once addicted to coffee, your body has an extremely hard time working and functioning without caffeine’s help. This can make you constipated–or the complete opposite. This is often caused because the caffeine in coffee affects the muscles in the digestive system.

So, as you can see, there are many things that happen to you internally when you drink the beans, from constipation, the loss of ability to control urination, and the gagging from the horrid taste. So…drink coffee or pee your pants in public? I wonder what you will choose….

*Affogato is an Italian coffee-based dessert.

Why I Hate The Color Yellow

January 18, 2023 by ehesson@pvs.org 4 Comments

By Junior Levi Kassinove

Middle-School Blogger Penny proposed we write about the color yellow. The Blog Staff accepted her challenge and came up with some surprising associations. Levi’s reaction went more in the direction of . . . yellow journalism.

CONTENT WARNING: I will trash on your favorite color if your favorite color is yellow.

Before I get into all of my reasons for hating the color yellow, let me just back up my opinion with cold, hard science. According to apartmenttherapy.com, yellow is the favorite color of a wee 5% of the people. Perhaps this means that I’m preaching to the choir. I imagine, however, 95% of people who don’t love yellow don’t completely detest yellow like I do. So, here are my top three reasons for hating the color yellow.

It’s the Symbol of Death and Decay

Head over to the cemetery and dig up your favorite grave. Open up the casket, and you’ll find a yellow corpse. Not a red corpse, not a green corpse, but a pale yellow corpse. When one has jaundice, one’s skin turns yellow. When one does not brush one’s teeth, one’s teeth turn yellow. When the yellow sun attacks people during the daytime, it can give them skin cancer, or worse, a farmer’s tan. Yellow is also the color of vomit. In general, yellow just radiates disease and rot. Some negative symbols with the color yellow include but are not limited to the radioactive symbol, wet floor signs, and general cautionary signs.

Yellow is a Negative Motif in Literature

In Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray, there is a yellow book that Lord Henry gives to Dorian, which, upon reading, throws Dorian down a spiral of self-hatred and guiltless crimes. In Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein, the monster that Victor creates is described as having yellow skin and yellow eyes. In a short story by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, titled The Yellow Wallpaper, a woman suffering a temporary psychosis hallucinates a woman being trapped behind snaking bars as she stares at her room’s yellow wallpaper. Finally, in Fyodor Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment, yellow is the color of Raskolnikov’s apartment walls, representing his impoverished state. No, I am not just listing off books from my English class.

It’s just straight up the worst color

When you see someone walking down the street, are they wearing yellow? 99% of the time, the answer is no. They are wearing jeans and a white t-shirt because they don’t want to look like they’re cosplaying as Morty Smith. Compare that to colors like blue and beige–the colors that look good in the world, and you’ll see that yellow has no place amongst these aesthetic giants. The sun is pretty, you say? Have you ever looked at it for more than three seconds? I didn’t think so. Yellow is a symbol of prosperity? It’s also what color your walls turn into when you smoke too often. I wouldn’t exactly call that a sign of prosperity.

Morty from the show *Rick and Morty* (usatoday.com)

From cancer-causing rays of sun to depictions of alcoholics in literature (Dostoevsky’s Marmeladov), yellow connotes the worst of the worst. It invokes a visceral reaction from me and many of my peers and teachers. Louisa said yellow makes her think of “thrown-up hot dogs.” Mr. Satterfield eloquently commented, “Yellow is the color of lukewarm indecision and treachery achieved by laziness.” Indy concluded that the color “reminds me of urine.”

Steak of the Gods–Wagyu

November 15, 2022 by ehesson@pvs.org Leave a Comment

By Junior Culinary Aficionado Levi Kassinove

Who wants turkey when you could have wagyu?

What is Wagyu?

A grade A5 Wagyu steak is Levi’s picture of beauty. (Photo source: robbreport.com)

You know steak. You might have heard of wagyu. Wagyu literally means Japanese cow, which has evolved to connote the highly marbled and expensive ($200 per pound) steak that we know today. Generally, people agree that the more marbling (intramuscular fat) a steak has the better. The marbling is the white stuff you see in the steak. The steak pictured is grade A5, which is the highest grade of wagyu. Wagyu is graded by the Japanese Meat Grading Association (mychicagosteak.com). I wonder if there is a Japanese Meat Tasting Association. If so, sign me up. Anyway, for comparison, here is a picture of normal angus steaks that you’d buy at the grocery store:

Typical angus steaks found in the typical grocery store. You don’t see as much marbling, although an angus is still good if cooked right. (Photo source: dartagnan.com)

As you can see, the wagyu steak has much greater marbling. But what does this mean for the flavor? How do you cook it? And, most importantly, is the price worth it? I’ll give you a hint: The answer to all three questions is “Yes.”

The Flavor

Assuming that the steak is cooked correctly (which I will get to later), wagyu will genuinely be one of the best, if not the best, food you will ever eat. Your favorite food is pasta? Pizza? Tacos? Not anymore. It’s wagyu now. You know what umami is? It’s the flavor that makes things taste good. You best believe that wagyu is full of it. When you take a bite, it’s like a hedonist party in your mouth. The amount of rendered fat in there will make you redefine the word “juicy.”

Honestly, I don’t know how else to describe it. The flavor of wagyu isn’t actually so complex. It has a sort of…fiery simplicity. There is an explosion of comfort. It is heavenly. I will say, though, that the more marbling a piece of wagyu has, the less it tastes like steak and more like a kind of refined grease. It certainly won’t make you feel good after eating it. That is why I recommend staying away from notoriously marbled cuts like ribeye. In my opinion, it will just be too fatty.

How to Cook Wagyu

I would say that 70% of what makes a steak good depends on how you cook it. For most steaks, the optimal way to cook a steak is by reverse searing, which is basically just cooking the steak in an oven before searing it on a piping hot cast iron skillet. Medium rare to rare is objectively the best level of doneness for steaks, as evidenced by the late chef Anthony Bourdain in his book Kitchen Confidential. Bourdain stated that people ordering well done steaks at a restaurant “pay for the privilege of eating our garbage,” and that anyone who does it is a “philistine” who “cannot tell the difference between food and flotsam” (mashed.com). Now, I’m about to say something that might make you hate me. I prefer wagyu that’s cooked medium. I know that some ~~idiots~~ inexperienced steak lovers will say that medium rare is still optimal for wagyu. And, if you want to try that, then have fun. Tell me how it goes. I’m sure it will still be good, but I encourage you to do a side by side comparison of my method vs. the regular medium rare reverse sear. The fact of the matter is that wagyu is just too fatty to be cooked like a regular steak. Cooking a wagyu steak medium rare or rarer will just not render (melt) all of the intramuscular fat (in my experience), leaving you with a steak that hasn’t reached its full potential. Now, I’m going to teach you how I cook wagyu. It’s based on the way Japanese chefs do it.

Materials:

A wagyu steak
A cast iron skillet or stainless steel pan
High quality salt (why use the cheap stuff on a $150 steak?)
Meat thermometer ~~for losers~~ (optional; you can touch the steak to gauge internal temp)

That’s seriously all I would use. Now, let’s get into the preparation. I’m assuming you know how to defrost a steak. If you’re thinking about defrosting it in the microwave or something, you might as well stop reading this article. Moving on, the next step is to trim the fat. Save whatever you’ve trimmed off because it will be important later. After that, salt the steak. Be generous. Cover all sides including the edges. If you think you’ve salted it enough, put a little more. Then, you’re going to want to put it in the fridge for at least an hour. What’s going to happen is the salt will draw moisture from the steak, then let it distribute back in. This is why you need so much salt. You are salting the whole steak. This tenderizes the steak and gives it more of an evenly distributed flavor. The longer you leave it in, the better. People do it for 24-48 hours even. But I don’t know if I could leave wagyu in the fridge for two days without eating it.

Cooked wagyu (Photo source: kitchencookbook.net)

Now that the preparation is over, the next step is to get the skillet ready. You’re going to want to get it as hot as possible. I would say like 700 degrees Fahrenheit is a good place to start. If you don’t have an infrared thermometer, you can just splash some water on the skillet and see if it evaporates instantly. At this point you should also take your trimmed fat out of the refrigerator for it to melt at room temperature. Once melted, brush the steak with the fat and coat the skillet. Now, cut the steak into strips or cubes, whatever you want. This will efficiently cook the steak. Now toss them onto the skillet and sear the strips for about a minute on each side. The time will vary depending on the thickness of the steak. Just take it out when you feel like it’s right. Also, be sure to have a fan running and a window open because it’s gonna get smoky.

That’s it, and that’s all. Have it with a glass of wine–or water for the kids. But, I know you’re not sharing your wagyu with your kids. If you’re having it with wine, just make sure it’s red, unless you want to expose yourself as someone who doesn’t understand how the universe works.

Is the price worth it?

Honestly, yes. Absolutely. If I were a billionaire I’d have it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I’d live fast and die young for wagyu. In all seriousness, if you can afford it, I’d highly recommend you try it at least once before you die. It is truly an unforgettable experience. Even if you can’t afford it, I suggest you still save for it. Who needs water and electricity? Who needs to respond to the IRS? Spend that otherwise wasted money on wagyu instead. You won’t regret it.

Indy’s Outlook for the Midterms

November 8, 2022 by ehesson@pvs.org 3 Comments

By Junior Political Pundit Indiana Behr

SPECIAL ELECTION COVERAGE

The midterms are today, and the outlook is…. unclear. In the age of more political polarization than we’ve seen in decades, electoral prediction has gotten much harder. This election’s results are likely to greatly affect our country’s political future, with issues like crime, abortion, taxes, and the Biden administration’s political agenda being in play. I am going to show some of my predictions and some interesting info about what’s to come. I am going to start with some competitive Senate elections, an unlikely gubernatorial standoff, and the swingy Congressional race in a new district that covers Rancho Mirage, Palm Springs, Palm Desert, and La Quinta.

Pennsylvania Senate

John Fetterman (D) and Dr. Mehmet Oz (R) debate in the general election (abcnews.com).

One of the most prominent Senate races in this cycle is the Pennsylvania Senate race. The incumbent, Pat Toomey (R), announced his intention to retire last year, and almost immediately, a bitter Republican primary broke out. The initial frontrunner was the Trump-endorsed former House candidate Sean Parnell, but after a child custody battle with his estranged wife made its way to the media, he withdrew, and shortly after, television personality Dr. Mehmet Oz and wealthy businessman Dave McCormick entered the race. Oz initially lost several polls, and the race seemed to lean in McCormick’s favor… until Trump endorsed Oz. He experienced a surge after this, and after a long election with threats of recounts, Oz won by just 0.07%, less than 1,000 votes.

The Democrats saw this seat as a potential flip in their favor, especially with the incumbency advantage gone. John Fetterman, the incumbent Lt. Governor of Pennsylvania, created an exploratory committee early on, and later officially entered the race. Then, a few months later, Rep. Conor Lamb entered; however, he failed to gain traction even when Fetterman attracted criticism for an incident where he chased a Black jogger with a shotgun in 2013 while mayor of Braddock, Pennsylvania. Fetterman stated he believed the man was connected to a recent shooting, but the jogger was not. Though Lamb received a multitude of endorsements, including three members of the House in Pennsylvania, and over thirty State Representatives, that ultimately was not enough, and Fetterman won with a margin of 32%, sweeping every single county.

Days before winning his primary, John Fetterman suffered a stroke. This has become a central point of the campaign. Due to this, Fetterman has publicly required the use of closed captioning devices to speak with reporters, and he used these devices during his debate with Oz. He has struggled to speak at times as a result, and this showed during the debate, where he occasionally struggled to get words out. Oz has been criticized for being out of touch with Pennsylvanians. Many people have claimed that Oz lived in New Jersey prior to the election, and he has also been called out for promoting medical practices not approved by the FDA on his show. Initially Fetterman led all polls by wide margins; however, it has gotten much closer over the last several weeks. Now, a couple polls show Oz with the lead. FiveThirtyEight has moved their prediction from “Lean D” (barely Democrat) to “Toss-Up.”

Georgia Senate

Another high-profile Senate Race is Georgia’s, where incumbent Raphael Warnock (D) is defending his seat against former football star Herschel Walker (R). The primaries for this race were not very contentious, and both won by very wide margins with no serious competition. The general election, on the other hand, has been the most controversy-filled this year in my opinion.

Almost all of these controversies surround Walker, yet he is still tied with Warnock in several polls, and he has even won several. Several news outlets have alleged that Walker paid for a woman to terminate her pregnancy, and on Monday, the New York Times reported that they had spoken to the anonymous woman, and she reportedly told them that two years after that incident, he unsuccessfully lobbied her to terminate another pregnancy. Walker has denied these allegations. Many have accused Walker of hypocrisy, as his campaign platform states that he has a pro-life stance. Other parts of his past, such as his unsubstantiated claim that he was an FBI agent, or his admittance that he played Russian roulette have also come under scrutiny. Walker may struggle in the general election due to these scandals.

New York Governor

On the left is Lee Zeldin (R) and on the right is Kathy Hochul (D)–the two wrangle for governor of New York (static01.nyt.com).

New York, a typically blue state, is seemingly facing an unlikely competitive race. After two competitive primaries, polling has indicated this race is down to the wire, with most showing incumbent Governor Kathy Hochul (D) ahead. Hochul, the former New York Lieutenant Governor, became governor following the resignation of Andrew Cuomo due to a sexual harassment scandal. The race instantly had a shake-up, as several candidates jumped into the Democratic primary for the position. Attorney General Letitia James launched her campaign early, but withdrew due to polls showing her trailing, and she is now running for reelection. New York City Public Advocate Jumaane Williams and New York Representative Thomas Suozzi also ran, but both candidates did not do well, sometimes polling in the single digits. Ultimately, Hochul won the primary by nearly 40%. This indicates that the Democratic electorate is firmly behind her, but the question is whether turnout will be enough to bring her across the finish line in the general election.

On the Republican side of the aisle, a race that initially seemed competitive ended in a landslide. Representative Lee Zeldin, 2014 New York Governor GOP nominee Rob Astorino, and Andrew Giuliani (son of former New York City Mayor and Trump lawyer Rudy Giuliani) were the three main candidates in the election. Despite previously aligning himself with Trump in the House, Zeldin painted himself as a moderate in contrast to other candidates. Polling showed the race was within single digits; however, this proved to be false when Zeldin won by over 20%.

New York is normally a solid Democratic state. After all, Joe Biden defeated Donald Trump by over 23% in the Presidential election. Despite that, this election has been uniquely close. One of the most prominent topics in this election is crime, and this is an issue where Hochul has attracted severe criticism. Crime has risen in New York City, and she has taken a hit for this. Hochul has criticized Zeldin’s support for the pro-life movement, and he deflected this by saying that he would not make any attempts to change reproductive health laws in New York if elected, a state where 63% of people have said they support expanded abortion rights. The latest poll from Emerson College shows Hochul at 52% and Zeldin at 44%, with 3% being undecided at this time.

US House CA-41

Incumbent Ken Calvert (R) and challenger Will Rollins (D) vie for the newly-drawn 41st district (gannett-cdn.com).

Following California’s redistricting, the incumbent Representative for Rancho Mirage, Palm Springs, and several other parts of the Coachella Valley switched from Raul Ruiz (D) to Ken Calvert (R). This race has become very competitive, as this is now a district that Trump won by just 1%. Trump endorsed Calvert, stating that he is, “a leader on National Security and Strongly Supports our Brave Military and Vets.” Calvert’s opponent is Will Rollins (D), a former prosecutor who received the second most votes in California’s nonpartisan jungle primary system, where all candidates are on the same ballot, and the top two candidates move to the general election regardless of party affiliation. Rollins has very effectively established his presence in the district. In fact, his signs are planted right outside of our school, and I see his television and YouTube ads daily. While I have seen the occasional Calvert sign, his presence is much less significant in the valley. The latest poll showed Calvert up by just 3 points, and Cook Political Report predicts this race as “Lean R,” their closest ranking after “Toss Up.”

I hope you found some of these races interesting, and I encourage you to do more research about our local Congressional race and other local races, and, for any senior students, teachers, administrators, parents, or anyone else reading who is eligible, please vote!