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The Bird is the Word: Sophisticated Schoolyard Shenanigans

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The Road Less Traveled

November 9, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org 2 Comments

By Peter Kadel

Last month, I went to the Schoepe Scout Reservation at Lost Valley to work as a volunteer for one of the off-season events. The entire weekend was packed with activities and shenanigans that made my time up there enjoyable. The event itself was not the only fun part; the journey there was also a part of the adventure. This is not because I don’t like the camp, but because to reach the camp I drive up a series of windy mountain roads that culminate in a ten-mile dirt road–a dirt road that is legend among the Boy Scouts of Southern California and parts of Arizona.

“The Road,” as we call it, is a bumpy, windy, washed-out, pot-hole-covered, ten-mile gauntlet that acts as the only public land entrance to the camp. The only other entrances to the camp are by helicopter or through an Indian Reservation. The road has quite the reputation with those who frequently drive to the camp. While the faint of heart may dread the long drive to Lost Valley, I cherish it. I would rather drive down a ten-mile dirt road through a stunning wilderness landscape that makes me feel at peace than drive for one mile on I-10 or any busy freeway in America.

Windy roads are more fun to drive once you have the hang of driving them. The rougher terrain and the sharper turns on windy dirt roads are much more engaging than straight busy highways. You can’t use cruise control or go on mental autopilot. The looser terrain also allows for sliding or drifting, which can be really fun as long as you are careful. The thrill of a fast turn of a dirt road is quite the adrenaline rush when you do it right. And, aside from the obvious fun, a windy dirt road signifies a separation from hustle-and-bustle cities and the trappings of society that in the end don’t really matter.

On my drive home, I actually had to stop driving for a good five minutes so I could just take in the beautiful vista before me, breathe in the clear air, exist for a minute in this paradise with a sky so blue that it took my breath away. The spiritual benefits cannot be replicated on busy highways. If that doesn’t convince you of the benefits of off-road driving, then consider this: when I’m on a major highway, I see people exchanging insults and honking at each other. In the backwoods, I barely see a soul. And, when I do, they’re kind-hearted people with a respect for nature and for those around them. The experiences found off the beaten track and in the heart of nature are something that everybody needs and most don’t get enough of. So go; find them.

Editor: Shelby Armor

Filed Under: driving dirt roads, The Outdoors, Uncategorized Tagged With: road less traveled, The Environment

One time at Summer Camp . . .

November 8, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org 1 Comment

By Charles Schnell, Survivor of the Fire Ants

Funny camp story. So, I walked into the dorm room after eating dinner. Two of my four roommates were in there. We’ll call them Andy and Jerry. So, we were in there for about an hour, just us three, until Andy said that he was going to take a shower. When he opens his suitcase, he noticed some ants crawling around. Bewildered, he lifted up his suitcase and his nearby laundry bag to discover a dead moth covered and surrounded by maybe fifty ants. They were everywhere: the carpet, the wall, the bottom of the legs of the bunk bed, the moth.

He shouted a word I can’t post on this blog and started hitting the ants with his laundry bag. Little did he know that the ants had already invaded the laundry bag. They started flying out with all of his flinging. Andy was screaming, “Get out! Get out! AHHHHH!” and, by this point, Jerry was up flailing his arms everywhere. Then, Jerry’s all like, “Hold on! Let me go get a vacuum!”

After Andy savagely whipped around his laundry bag (full of smelly clothes and fire ants), Jerry came back to save the day with a vacuum. He plugged it in on the other side of the room and turned it on. But, here’s the thing–he didn’t use the vacuum like a normal person; rather he started slapping it against the floor repeatedly. Yeah, that’ll show those ants….

The thing is, it actually did.

Jerry was lowering their numbers; however, they never died out completely. And, after about maybe five minutes of them screaming like it’s the end of days, Andy and Jerry eventually found the source of the ants: a little, puny hole in the wall. So, they came up with a grand plan to stop the ants.

“I’ll go get some bug spray!” Jerry yelled as he ran out to the hallway, vacuum still running. Andy decided it was his turn to slam the vacuum on the carpet (and against the walls where the ants were crawling). During the time Andy and I were the only ones in the room, there was a moment where I looked out the open door into the hall to see Jerry being chased by boys a foot taller than him with cans of bug spray.

“Here’s your bug spray, Jerry!”

“AHHHHH!”

I was thankful to find out that Jerry survived, but he came back empty handed. But, it was fine because as soon as he did come back, Andy put down the vacuum he’d been smashing against the wall and whipped a cylinder out of his bag: “Look, Jerry, I had some ALL ALONG!”

Andy started spraying practically everything in the room with bug spray, while the room’s portable fan carried the spray further. Jerry ran out again and came back with some thick, heavy-duty scotch tape and sealed up the bug-spray-drenched hole. Then, in overkill enthusiasm, Andy started spraying the scotch tape. “You never know, man. You never know,” he said shaking his head.

So, the tape and all the bedsheets were drenched in bug spray. I didn’t want to sleep in bug spray; the can said it was poisonous, but Andy and Jerry complained about a much more serious problem: the smell. The room reeked of bug spray. Then, Jerry got another brilliant idea. He went over to one of our other roommate’s bags (we’ll call him Dave) and pulled out his big can of Febreeze–which was only half full. To suppress the bug-spray stench, he sprayed it all over the room. The Febreeze didn’t really do anything other than add on to the stench, rather than suppressing it.

So, let’s take a look at the room in its new form: a carpet now clean of ants; a wall with a bunch of dents in it; wet, bug-spray-stained pieces of scotch tape; a vacuum that no one bothered to turn off for the whole dilemma; bedsheets laced with bug spray and Febreeze; and two idiots bragging how they saved the day.

So, here are the morals of the story: I’m horrible for not helping in the slightest and I’m sorry (although it did make for a good story); don’t use a vacuum like a moron would; and a job that could take one person ten to fifteen minutes to fix took two teenage boys almost an hour.

 

Editor: Brennan Nick

Filed Under: Humor, The World, Travel Tagged With: ants, Camp, summer, vacuum

Celtic Knot

November 8, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org 1 Comment

Graphic by Harlow Berny

By Harlow Berny

 

Here are 6 Celtic knot facts, because why knot?

  • The Irish Celts were the people who perfected the art of the Celtic knot, but it is thought that the knots may have originated from Romans, and possibly have roots in Byzantine Constantinople.*
  • True Celtic knots have absolutely no loose ends and are completely one line.
  • Certain Celtic knots can have different meanings and purposes.
  • The basic understanding is that they symbolize how life is an unending cycle.
  • According to Irish tattoo artists, it’s mainly white Americans that get a Celtic knot tattoo.
  • It’s more culturally relevant for a white person to get a Celtic knot tattoo than a “tribal” or “native inspired” tattoo.**

 

Editor: Shelby Armor

*Disclaimer: This does not represent the beliefs of all members of thebirdonfire.org or PVS.

**Disclaimer: This line comes from the perspective of a Native American.

Sources: http://www.gaelicmatters.com/celtic-knot-symbols.html and http://www.npr.org/sections/parallels/2014/11/25/366584255/the-american-origins-of-the-not-so-traditional-celtic-knot-tattoo

Filed Under: Culture, The World, Visual Arts Tagged With: Celtic knot, Irish, Why knot?

easy self care tips:

November 2, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org 3 Comments

By Makena Behnke, Lifestyle/Poet Guru

  • take care of your skin. wear face masks, wash your face, etc.
  • drink your water. it improves your mood and overall helps your health.
  • take some time to yourself. don’t always feel like you have to talk and/or hang out with your friends 24/7.
  • drink some green tea. it has multiple health benefits; makes your skin glow as well as boosting your metabolism. if you don’t like the taste, you can always sweeten it.
  • plan for the future. don’t get too stressed out though, just make a list of things you want to do when you’re an adult/later on in life.
  • read. just read.
  • take care of your body. inside and out.
  • eat some fruit every once in awhile.
  • find something interesting and educational to study outside of school. like religion or different languages.
  • don’t keep your feelings bottled up.
  • treat yourself to something sweet every once in awhile.
  • find some way to calm yourself down wherever you are.
  • write a song or poem about how you feel. it doesn’t have to be good, no one needs to see it if you don’t want them to.
  • fake it till you make it. stand tall, and smile often.

Editor & Lifestyle Co-Guru: Brennan Nick

Filed Under: Culture, Poetry Tagged With: Poem-in-hiding

Avalyn

November 1, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org Leave a Comment

By Renée

 

You wake up everyday–

every single day.

What makes you get up everyday?

Some of you might tell me right away,

but some of you may not yet know.

I’ll keep living everyday,

thinking I know; knowing I know.

But, will I ever tell a soul?

No.

Life will keep beating me.

It will trip me up; tear me apart.

Life will keep loving me.

It will give me its gifts; let me play my part.

Some days it’s aimless,

other days I can’t think of anything else.

But please let you keep this to yourself,

here I’m sharing a piece of my heart.

 

Editor Makena Behnke

Filed Under: Poetry Tagged With: Life

How the Polls Weren’t Wrong: A Look at the 1948 and 2016 Elections

November 1, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org 1 Comment

By Brennan Nick, AP World History Student and Political Strategist

 

In the 2016 election there was much discussion afterward about the polls being wrong, being off, or being untrustworthy. This, however, has been greatly exaggerated compared to the reality of what happened. Yes, polls in Michigan and Pennsylvania predicted Hillary Clinton to be the winner, but the margins overall were close enough that a Trump victory would have been within the margin of error. The one exception to this margin of error was Wisconsin, and only Wisconsin, where the polls both predicted Hillary to be the winner, and did not have a possibility of a Trump victory within the margin of error. Another example of how the polls were still fairly accurate was in the average of the national polls (the popular vote) which predicted Clinton to win by a 3.2 point margin over Trump. The final results of the election was a Clinton lead by 2.1 points. The difference between the polls and the reality was 1.1 point, hardly anything out of the ordinary.

 

Now, one election where the polls were in fact wildly off was the 1948 election between Harry S. Truman and Thomas E. Dewey. Harry S. Truman was the incumbent as he was the vice-president when FDR died of a stroke in April 1945. Going into the election Dewey, a Republican, was seen as the clear favorite to win after 16 years of a Democrat in the White House. This was further supported by the situation Truman–a Democrat–was in. The Democratic party had a three-way divide at the time between the far left of the party and the far right of the party; each of which split off into the Progressive Party and the Southern Dixiecrat party respectively. This then left only the center of the party which was now being led by Truman who was facing plummeting popularity when the elections began.

 

The stage was set and the candidates played their cards. Long story short, Dewey and his supporters were so sure that he was bound to win that they decided to run a campaign where all he had to do was not make any glaring mistakes and he would win the Presidency. His speeches were filled with non-political optimism, unity of the country, and broad, vague, optimistic goals including his now notorious quote, “You know that your future is still ahead of you.” Moreover, he avoided–as if his life depended on it–any issue that could be considered controversial. Truman, on the other hand, knowing that he was behind, took up an aggressive, slash-and-burn campaign and held nothing back. He mocked Dewey and the Republican Party and called out Dewey by name, criticizing him. However, as Truman went around the nation spewing fire against his opponents, he was the only one who still believed he could win. His own campaign members considered it “a last hurrah,” and his wife later admitted to having private doubts during the campaign.

 

On election night, the Dewey campaign was confidently waiting in a New York City hotel room, and newspapers had already printed a “Dewey win” on their front pages. Everyone, the polls, the journalists, even Truman’s closest supporters, expected a Dewey win. That, however, was a victory the Dewey Campaign would not have. Truman ended up overcoming all of the odds and won the election, coming within 1% of several, tipping-point, swing states. Even at the end of election day, NBC still predicted Dewey to be the winner once late returns came in. However, once the morning came, it was clear that Harry S. Truman won the election, and a picture was taken of him defiantly holding The Chicago Tribune which was printed the night before with the headline

“DEWEY DEFEATS TRUMAN.” 

 

What happened? Well, the largest explanation is that this was one of the first elections in which polling was in fact extensively used, and, as such, it had many flaws. The largest of these was the belief that the vast majority of all voters in an election make their choice before October and that the fall campaigns just simply would not sway many voters. However, as it turned out, according to historian William Manchester, “Gallup’s September 24 report foresaw 46.5% for Dewey to 38% for Truman. His last column, appearing in the Sunday papers two days before the election, showed Truman gaining sharply – to 44 percent – and the interviews on which it was based had been conducted two weeks earlier. The national mood was shifting daily, almost hourly.” Later polling revealed that roughly 15% of Truman’s voters decided to vote for him within the last two weeks of the election. Perhaps all of this can be attributed to the difference between Truman’s decisiveness and Dewey’s indifference that swayed the voters.

 

Whatever may have been the case, neither this election nor the 2016 election provide any reason to believe in the future that polling will be that far off, much less flat out wrong. Polling gets it just about . . . right.

 

Editor: Charles Schnell

 

Filed Under: Culture, Current News, Media, Politics, The World Tagged With: Dewey, polling, Truman

Java Java Java

October 27, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org 1 Comment

By Makena Behnke

When you’re in high school, or any stressful environment requiring bursts of energy and attention, caffeine is a staple, whether it be Dr. Pepper, Red Bull, black tea, or some form  of coffee. Some people are big believers in the wonders of coffee, and some believe that it stunts your growth. Whatever the case, you cannot deny that coffee will ever go out of style. The chance of running into someone with a coffee cup in hand is inevitable. Now, there are many different types of coffee in this world and many different types of coffee drinkers; some prefer it with sugar, some with cream, and some have a ridiculous order that only they can remember. There are the obvious coffees: black coffee, coffee with cream or milk or sugar, lattes, cappuccinos, and frappuccinos. There are many other preparations of the beloved bean.

  1. Latte– cappuccino without the foam. There’s not much else to say… It’s good.
  2. Cappuccino– espresso with steamed milk foam. Pretty standard drink.
  3. Espresso– a highly concentrated shot of coffee you take right before cramming for finals.
  4. Espresso macchiato– espresso with milk foam, for the lighter studying you have to do.
  5. Espresso con panna– whipped cream and espresso, when you need to get some ~extra~ calories.
  6. Espresso con miele– espresso sweetened with honey. Save the bees by stealing their life’s work.
  7. Flat white– microfoam over single or double espresso… hip version of saying steamed milk foam.
  8. Caffe mocha– a chocolate flavored latte. Need I say more?
  9. Mochaccino– chocolate cappuccino.
  10. Doppio– a double espresso. The kind of coffee you need to get through a block day…
  11. Cortado– espresso mixed with warm milk.
  12. Affogato– espresso with ice cream…
  13. Cafe bonbon– sweetened condensed milk and espresso, crafted to make your heart stop if you have more than three.

* “Winter” is coming; stay warm. Drink coffee.

Editor: Brennan Nick

Filed Under: Culture, Food Tagged With: coffee, java, mocha chocolate caramel swirl-a-chino

From where do you draw inspiration?

October 27, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org 1 Comment

Junior Asher Mai is an ardent reader of John Green and a recent expert on Robert Frost (thanks to his AP English Language Synthesis Project), so when he found a line of Frost quoted in the newest John Green book, Turtles All the Way Down, Asher felt inspired to write the following poem. 

 

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: It goes on.”–Robert Frost, as quoted by John Green

By Asher Mai

 

A red autumn leaf had fallen

And the wind had blown

He had flown seven thousand miles

To the other side of the Pacific Ocean

It was a path that he had chosen

 

He enjoyed the new environment

And learned to be independent

He had an amazing experience

An experience that he would

never have dreamed to experience

 

Summer had come

It’s time to go home

But his spiral of consciousness

had started to tighten

Because it’s a path he had not yet chosen

A future that was not yet known

Editor: Makena Behnke

Filed Under: Culture, Poetry Tagged With: Asher Mai, John Green, Robert Frost

Spoopy Scary Firebirbs

October 26, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org Leave a Comment

Graphic by Harlow Berny

By Harlow Berny

Boo! Did I send shivers down your spine? Scarefest is coming, and this year it’s going to be on Friday the 27th starting at 9:00 pm and ending at 6:00 am the next day (Saturday). The admission fee is $20, and you can’t pay at the gate, so make sure to pay your $20 before school ends on Friday! There are no physical tickets this year, only a handwritten list. You’ll be able to pay your way onto the list until 8:10 am before school starts on Friday. You can pay Ms. Sholander if you miss the ASB students in the morning. Remember to get a permission slip signed and handed into Ms. Sholander as well or you won’t be let in. Have a spoopy Halloween!

 

Editor: Makena Behnke

 

*Yes, we did reference dead memes. This is because Halloween is when the dead rise again.

Filed Under: Current News, School Events

The Willful Child–A Fairy Tale Re-Telling

October 25, 2017 by szachik@pvs.org 1 Comment

Graphic also by Harlow Berny

Retold by Harlow Berny

Centuries ago, in a long forgotten kingdom, there was a willful daughter of a single peasant woman. She refused to do even the simplest things that her mother told her, no matter if it was something that the girl liked to do or would keep the child healthy and safe. For this reason, the girl went and ran through the house of an old man who had recently died, and she contracted some horrid illness that had killed him. No doctor could heal the child as she fell into her death-bed. Soon the peasant’s daughter was lain in a coffinless grave and was covered in dirt, until suddenly her arm burst through the ground and stood tall, grasping for the sunlight. When a mound of new dirt was placed over the arm, the arm pushed it away, time after time again. Eventually, the girl’s mother was brought and made to strike the hand down with a rod. Upon doing so the hand shot back into the ground and the daughter’s soul finally left her long-dead body. While we know that the little girl’s soul abandoned her body, we do not know if the soul flew to the gates of heaven for the fact that she was but a child, or sank to the gates of hell for never obeying her mother and causing her own death in her careless actions…

 

Editor: Brennan Nick

A Re-Telling of Grimm’s

Filed Under: Fairy Tales Tagged With: Grimm's

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About

We are the Palm Valley Firebirds of Rancho Mirage, California. Join us in our endeavors. Venture through the school year with us, perusing the artwork of our students, community, and staff. Our goal is to share the poems, stories, drawings and photographs, essays and parodies that come out of our school. Welcome aboard!